September 25^th, 2026

How to Live Without a Self (and Be a Better Person)

A central doctrine of Buddhist philosophy is that we don’t have selves, that we are selfless persons. That doesn’t mean that we don’t exist; it means that we exist in another way. We don’t exist substantially or intrinsically or independently, but our existence, like the existence of everything else, is interdependent, conventional, constantly changing...

There are times when we do succeed in forgetting ourselves, maybe in the contemplation of beautiful art or in listening to music, maybe in a deep and meaningful exchange with a close friend, maybe when we’re playing a sport or engaged in practicing something in which we’re highly skilled, where our sense of self and of subject-object duality just vanishes and we suddenly realize, at a certain point, that we haven’t been thematizing ourselves for a very long time... When we’re spontaneous, we are at our best...

Once we see that we are not solo improv stand-up players but rather members of a vast improv collective, we can recognize that the only way that I can succeed is if we succeed. The only way I can be happy is if we’re happy. And the only way my life can be meaningful is if our lives are meaningful.

Jay Garfield, Podcast, Tricycle May 24, 2022